The untrimmed garden of my heart

silently in the trembling corridors of my body i cry
do not forget me, i will not be forgotten
i will spread my wild thick dark tendrils
curling as my most enfolded electric hair
spread of ample thighs and ass slide inside your most secret places
until you cannot tell
your heart beating this fickle human blood from mine
like rich red blood of velvet wine
and white pearls of teeth clinking edges of crystal glasses
like a pauper at the banquet, my pockets are empty of social graces
i left the pack of wild wolves who raised me back at home
from the tender age of 17 i fell off the edge of my high school diploma
and made a more comfortable pillow sleeping with tattered alcoholic angels
on the runaway streets of amnesiac suburban towns

and of all the ways love is forbidden
and of all the secret things that grow wild
in the untrimmed garden of my heart
most of all
is this forbidden love from my family
and god you alone know how many days
have i cried for rain on my piece of inherited earth?
i have rent my clothing to lay down weeping
bringing rain from eyes not clouds to humbly feed the thirsty darkness
and i stand before the masses to proclaim like a feverish prophet,
friends, all that has been unfairly called darkness i call infinity,
the mystery
the misunderstood depths calling to be embraced from the void
the fig-mouthed fecund womb of forever disappearing into the night
and i offer what is left of this smoldering naked body to be smothered
in the insatiable mouth of mother earth
after destruction, all that is left is the eager seed of desire to create again

and in all the ways love is our most confusing and forbidden god
and of all the secret things that grow wild
in the untrimmed garden of my heart
i hold a place for you here family
father, mother
as i always have
whether stumbling blindly down sorrowful alleys
thirsty for the slake of drink
to quench the thirst of my spirit in the desert we call human relations
i hold a place for you like sad eyed pilgrims
carrying candle torches in midnight vigils for lost children
i carry an image of you burned in my breastplate
before i was old enough to understand
the road of battle and tatters of shambling, beautific, berry-stained love
down alleys with mouth full of powdered bones
and erotic breath of the magic seed,
caught on red tongue before spilled to dark pavement

i have cried out for you
for the recasting of the spells
the sorrow, the ache, the longing
the burning and tossing in sweat soaked sheets
alone and with lovers i have wrestled my angels
and questioned the gods of my people
and risked punishment, impurity and condemnation for truth
that flaming sword
the mend the seal that has been broken
to bring contentment and life and love everlasting into all our hearts

selah (amen)